McFee's Musings

June 18, 2012

SECRETS

Filed under: Poet's Pot Pouri — dwightmcfee @ 12:36 am

Secrets can be the best of times and the worst of times. Secrets are intimacy. Secrets are thrilling. Secrets are generous. Secrets can be deadly.

Our secret, Cayle and Dwight. Keeping Cancer Secret.

On the stage as I held Cayle in To Distraction where she is killed in a car accident. I see the audience tearing and they don’t know, only feel the energy from us both, maybe. No one knows screams my brain with the need to holler out the truth! And yet at the same time my heart fills with intimacy as we ALL, knowing or unknowing, come to terms with the FEELINGS of loss and tragedy. Art and life, life and art. To finish a performance with my mate in love and death and art and life paradoxically leaves us in awe at the magnificence and sorrow of being alive.

In mid October, a week into shooting Back Down The Road, Cayle calls from set somewhat in a panic, ( the shoot had been pushed a month and Cayle was pretty thin, people where worried) telling me that physicals were going to be tomorrow. We plotted all night how to bribe, cajole and hoodwink the physician. Cayle had a Trenckoff catheter to drain the fluids that she expertly disguised. We showed up the next morning full of trepidation. All day. But it didn’t happen. He didn’t come. Sometimes secrets are generous!

And then the secret is out. We have to go to palliative care. We can’t do it anymore. We lay in each other’s arms all weekend, hold hands and seek visceral contact with kisses of kindness, kisses of fear, kisses of closeness that only we know. A different kind of secret. Inevitability.

June 17, 2012

HARPANADA

Filed under: Culture & Entertainment,Politics — dwightmcfee @ 5:22 am

MM press: The former Canadian now Harpadian government has announced the formal change through a cabinet order press release.

The press release goes on to say the Prime Minister, while at his retail mall dominionist church service on Sunday received a ‘communication’ via God from Bondholders implying they had more confidence in Prime Minister Harper than the country of Canada and thusly for confidence sake and the economy the PM should change the name of Canada to Harpanada or suffer the consequences.

Foreign Minister Big John ‘the hammerhead’ Baird and Defense Minister Peter ‘loser’ McKay immediately announced the IPO for Alberta on the New York Stock exchange as an investment in America’s future and the stability of Harpanada.

CORPORATISM-defined

Filed under: Politics — dwightmcfee @ 1:51 am

As I watched the President of the United States deliver his State of the Union address as well as waited for the Prime Minister of Canada to deliver his obescient speech to the annual gathering of the financial elites and their courtiers at the DAVOS Conference ( revealing the new old age pension regime to the financial thugs), I’m constantly amazed that the word CORPORATISM is never uttered.
Their are corporations represented there by their C.E.O.’s, C.F.O.’s etc. There are individual corporate entities, NGO corporate entities, everything is a corporate entity. As John Ralston Saul defines corporatism in the Doubter’s Companion:
” Among the most important yet most rarely used words. Better than any other it describes the organization of Modern Society.”
Mr. Saul goes on, “Corporatism is the persistent rival school of representitive government.”

Then why is it that we never hear, use or utter that word? We’re idiots!

In Memorium

Filed under: Poet's Pot Pouri — dwightmcfee @ 1:46 am

It has been a long, almost two years since McFee’s Musings last post. I place it in the Poet’s corner because it is personal and deeply painful. My wonderful wife Cayle Chernin passed away Feb. 18, 2011 from cancer.

Many, many family and friends came to the rescue, once we announced it, having to keep it a secret for several months so Cayle could complete the sequel to the 1970 Canadian seminal film, Going Down The Road: Back Down The Road. This is the only film I am aware of that has 3 of the 4 original cast in a film fourty years later about the same people. Cayle and I were in rehearsals for the play To Distraction in Toronto when dealt the mortal blow.

Over the next months I will attempt, intermittently, to tell the story of those many months as Cayle and I kept a secret. The story of a woman of strength, wisdom and creativity. And fierce. Forged in the imagination of an artist. So much so that friends and family had a large celebration which raised a fair amount of money to support The Cayle Chernin Award, www.caylecherninaward.ca.
This award is a project grant of $1000.00, awarded to an emerging or transitioning female artist’s project.

An overview of Cayle’s artistic life and blog can be found at http://www.cayle.ca

I was a very lucky man. I’m eternally grateful for our time together. I love you.

To all friends and family: thank you so very much!

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